Monday, September 21, 2009

Take your booty!

If it’s free I want it! If I can gatecrash your party I will! If I can keep going for parties and never have to invite people over or even take something along, I will! If I can come out for lunch with you without paying I will! If I have a party to go to and I don’t have clothes I shall borrow! If I need onions, potatoes, eggs or whatever and I am too lazy to go shopping (or too stingy?), I shall borrow from my neighbour time and again!
Freeloaders! How do we get them off our backs? This is one species of humanity who are absolutely brazen and shameless, who are always on the lookout to prey on other human beings. They are the takers, very rarely the givers. Giving is usually only when they have to and is most often done very reluctantly.
A few of us were discussing this phenomenon the other day; after all, most of us have at least one freeloader in our gang. And, most of us professed helplessness. How do you tackle someone who freeloads? A couple of my friends were very clear – saying they would just speak out. But for many of us, speaking out becomes delicate. After all the first time someone crashes your party uninvited, you would possibly welcome them out of politeness. Or the first time someone borrows, you are unaware that they are going to make a habit of it. But as time passes, freeloaders, I’ve discovered become more and more blatant. Give them an inch, and they’ll gallop away with the proverbial yard!

So, how do you recognise a freeloader? Here are some tips!!! (Remember, freeloaders are very, very friendly souls!)
Ø Never take their car out when they go shopping with you. You put the petrol…always.
Ø The same goes with autos – you pay!
Ø Very rarely carry their purse with them. If they do, they invariably profess to have no money.
Ø Invite themselves over to your place or gatecrash your parties time and again but never return the favour.
Ø Shamelessly go for every party they are invited to and rarely reciprocate.
Ø At any ‘going Dutch’ meal, they invariably say they will pay later…and never do.
Ø They will borrow anything – from vegetables to money to clothes to jewellery to your car to CDs to your shoes to …to…to…well just about anything except your husband maybe!
Ø Rarely if ever give gifts to their hosts
Ø Receive expensive gifts and reciprocate with cheap stuff.

Well, freeloading is a way of life for this species and unless they are told, they continue to take you and everyone else for granted. Cheapskates…that’s what they are. The solution…hmmm that’s tough. Maybe we should start freeloading on them!


  1. Hey! I know they type. And this woman is a loaded freeloader!

  2. Hmmm... have you ever tried freeloading off a freeloader? Try... and let me know! :)

  3. Ha ha...that's a good idea...but you know what? Freeloaders will never let you freeload off them! :) They are too smart...that's why they are freeloaders and we are the suckers!